“The Other Woman”

Season 4, Episode 6


Harper: Hi, I’m Harper, I’ll be your head shrinker today.
Juliet: Everybody on this island wigs me out. What’s that about?
Harper: Mostly about everybody being creepy. I’ll prescribe you something for that.
Tom: ’Scuse me, Harper, but Ben wants to see Juliet.
Ben: I got you a house with a stocked fridge, opera CDs, a hot tub and a heart-shaped bed with red silk sheets.
Juliet: Definitely getting the wiggins again. Maybe Harper will up my dose…

Jack: Where’s Daniel and Charlotte?
Jin: They snuck into the woods.
Jack: Why didn’t you tell me?!
Jin: You said they’re our friends.
Jack: That’s no excuse! Even your friends want to kill you half the time around here! What’s wrong with you?!

Harper: Hi Juliet. It’s nice to see you, you man-stealing tart!
Juliet: Nice to see you too, you insane, castrating harpy! Let’s hug!
Harper: No time! The boat people are going to the Tempest station to gas everybody. Ben wants you to kill them.
Juliet: How’d Ben find out what’s happening? How’d he get word to you? How’d you get here so quick? Why’d he want me to do it? If it’s so important, why not do it yourself?
Harper: Your logic’s useless against my ability to vanish into thin air! *Poof*

Goodwin: Hi, I’m Goodwin. You might remember me from such episodes as “The Other 48 Days.”
Juliet: Doesn’t ring a bell. You’re cute, though… I like you more than that stupid, no good, prying bee-eye-tee-see-eych, Harper.
Goodwin: She’s my wife.
Juliet: Oh.
Goodwin: It’s kinda hot that you can open your mouth wide enough to put your whole foot inside!

Kate: Hey guys!
Daniel: How’s Miles?
Kate: He’s fine, as long as his jaw doesn’t get tired… And the good news is he’s only conspiring to kill one of you! What’s up with you guys?
Charlotte: Our radio’s dead.
Kate: Funny how its power light’s still on. Can I look in your bag?
Charlotte: As long as you kneel down with you back to me.
Kate: Thanks, you’re a doll. What’s with the gas masks? Ow!
Daniel: She walked right into that.
Charlotte: Probably shouldn’t’ve bothered. If she fell for that, she’s clearly too stupid to realize we’re up to something.

Claire: Hi Locke. I’m less intimidating than you. Can I talk to Miles?
Locke: Sure but I doubt he’ll feel like saying much.

Ben: Are your people getting uppity yet?
Locke: Grumble, grumble.
Ben: If you let me have a house, I’ll help you.
Locke: Why should I?
Ben: I dunno. Jack let Daniel and Charlotte run off, Juliet’s decided to follow my orders and Kate left herself wide open for a sucker punch. I thought you might be acting like a blithering idiot too.
Locke: Well, shucks, I guess we could give it a try. Last time we teamed up you only shot me once…
Ben: What? Really?! Sweet!

Ben: Here’s a video of the guy who owns the boat. Charles Widmore.
Locke: Good to know.
Ben: Now you’d better sit down. I’m about to reveal the identity of my spy on the boat.
Locke: Oh, you mean Michael?

Goodwin: Hi Juliet. Want a sandwich?
Ben: A sandwich. Right. Jeez, you’re obvious.

Harper: You stole my man, you pouty, glassy-eyed little slut!
Juliet: Not my problem you don’t know how to please him, you old hag!
Other Others: Jer-ry! Jer-ry! Jer-ry!

Jack: Kate, are you all right?
Kate: I’d say Charlotte knocked me senseless but I think it actually might have helped.
Juliet: *Poof*
Jack: Where’d Juliet go?
Kate: You took your eyes off her? Dang, you’re stupid. Maybe you could use a blow to the head too.

Juliet: I don’t think we should let Ben know about our affair.
Goodwin: What’s he gonna do?
Ben: Goodwin, go infiltrate the tail section.
Goodwin: Man, that’s cold. Well, I’ll only be away a few days…

Kate: Juliet went this way. Charlotte and Daniel were a half hour ahead of her.
Jack: Okay, time out. How can you possibly tell from their tracks that they were a half hour ahead?
Kate: We’re just assuming the audience is a stupid as us this week.

Ben: I’ve got a surprise for you.
Juliet: What’s that?
Ben: Your boyfriend impaled on a stake! Muahahahaha!
Juliet: That’s… That’s… What kind of sicko surprise is that? Why’d you do that?
Ben: Because, YOU’RE MINE!
Juliet: Holy crap, dude. Maybe you need a teeny tiny time out. I mean, whoa!

Juliet: Finally, the Tempest! Sneak, sneak, sneak. Freeze, Daniel!
Daniel: Ben’s trying to gas the whole island. You’ve gotta let us finish.
Juliet: I’ve got no reason to trust you and every reason to trust Ben. Hey, wait a second! It’s the other way around. I hate him. I’ve ALREADY betrayed him. Why’d I even come here?
Charlotte: Judo chop!
Juliet: Don’t even try it.

Kate: Freeze!
Juliet: They just saved us.
Jack: Good enough for me.
Kate: I wanna see for myself.
Charlotte: Then come in here alone with us and we’ll show you. After you!
Kate: Duh. Okay!
Juliet: They’re fighting Ben. He’s kinda possessive and when he wins you don’t want to be anywhere near me!
Jack: Then why the heck have you been throwing yourself at me, woman?!

Sawyer: I can’t believe you beat me at horse shoes!
Hurley: I rule at all games. Yet I’m fat. So many layers!
Ben: I’ll play winner.
Sawyer: Okay. WhaitaminutewhattheHECK?!?!?